Today I spent my entire morning and afternoon in Waterford at Oakland Schools listening to Dr. Ross Greene speak to an audience of educators and parents about Collaborative Problem Solving. CPS is a model of care aimed at children who need help with problem solving the most. Our socially, emotionally, and/or behaviorally challenged kids. Dr. Greene’s process of problem solving brings everyone to the table to work together as a team for a mutually agreed solution. It helps develop lagging skills in our kids and opens up dialogue between parent (teacher) and child. This system is also very effective with children who do not have developmental delays. It’s also helpful for marriages and any other relationship. It’s about opening up discussions and resolving problems. Together.

My husband and I are blessed with three beautiful and intelligent children. Yet, they are not without their challenges. We have been working very closely with Dr. Greene’s system since early this winter and we have seen a dramatic difference in our interactions with our children when problems arise. It is also making a difference in how our kid’s teacher approaches problems in the classroom. It has made a very positive impact on our children. Where we once only saw meltdowns and avoidance, we’re experiencing communication and empathy. It’s not perfect – we still have meltdowns but we’re seeing a dramatic difference. In fact, most of the times we see meltdowns – it’s because we forgot to use our CPS skills. It’s hard work and takes practice, but the benefits are so worth it. Our child is starting to recognize that we are not adversaries, but allies.

I wanted to share this with my readers. I know I’m not the only parent of a challenging kid. I hope that Dr. Greene’s website can help those parents out there that are ready to try something new.  You can read Lives in the Balance, Dr. Green’s nonprofit website for more details. I highly recommend reading his book “The Explosive Child”, it’s extremely eye-opening. It changed the way we viewed our child’s challenges. Dr. Greene firmly believes that all children do well when they can.  His methods help us get them there.